William Todd - Death Row Georgia

 Hello, Future Of The World.  That's exactly who you are.

 Think about that for a minute. How do you like the shape the world is in today?  Well, think about it. We need your help. Your younger brothers and sisters need your help. That's a pretty radical thought isn't it?  What are you going to do about it?  Without you...there is no future. 

My name is William Todd. I'm sitting here on death row and I'm thinking about you. I'm afraid for you. Just look at the problems many of you are facing right now.  Many of you have it worse than I do. I've got it made. I get fed regularly and I get clothes and shelter. I have all a man needs to survive. I even know when I'll die give or take a five years. 

Of course my life has its downfalls, also. I've lost all my choices and rights as a citizen in your world. I don't choose what I eat. I don't choose what I wear, I don't even have any say as to how long or short my hair is and I'm not allowed to feel green grass beneath my feet. My world is concrete and iron bars. I'm not a career criminal. I have no long list of crimes. In fact I've never been in prison before. What has my being here got to do with you being here? What has my word got to do with you shaping the future of your world?  Simple every day choices.
 Choices

Monday May 15, 1989 I arrived on Georgia's death row.   I didn't' think much about it. Three days later a man walked past me with all his personal belongings in a basket.  I didn't know where he was going but I learned the next day he was executed in the electric chair. Then it hit me. I was told 2,000 volts of electricity does to a human body.  All your internal organs sizzle like bacon in a skillet. Your lungs and brain disintegrate. You urinate and your bowls excrete in your clothing.  Your eyes pop out and the jolt hits you so hard that your muscles contract and break many of your bones.  You bleed from every organ in your body.

 CHOICES

How did I end up here?  Through many small choices that resulted in my leaving your world. Simple choices. I chose to be cocky and got thrown out of home at 15.  No problem...I had a good job.  I always had good jobs. I didn't have to steal.  I chose to smoke refer.  Hey, no problem.... I never worried about anything. I was always high. I got bored with pot so I chose to do speed and then cocaine.  I was a junkie for there years. Hey, no problem...I beat it. I got straight and started my own remodeling business.

 CHOICES

I chose to get married...three times. I had a son and daughter from two sets of wives. I survived two suicide attempts, and several attempts on my life by other junkies. I witnessed the death of my sister and I was still sane and in one piece.  Hey, no problem.

 I figured all my problems were behind me.  All these wrong choices didn't seem to be hurting me now.  I never got busted, I wasn't a crook.  I made it through high school and I went to college. I worked hard and overcame heavy obstacles. 

 I could not see what I was doing to myself until one day the 17 year old woman I was in love with got hooked on crack cocaine.  She fell apart right in front of my eyes. She got so strung out that she began trading sex for a piece of rock. Crack cocaine, I was totally devastated.

    I tried talking to her, but that didn't work so I finally had to let her go. She completely fell apart. I was so broken hearted that I began to fall apart as well. One day she phoned and said, "William, I want to quit. I want to give up drugs." 

   I went to pick her up from a motel room. I couldn't believe my eyes. She was skinny, filthy and she had holes in her hands and arms from shooting drugs. I found her in bed with another junkie. All I care about was helping this once beautiful friend of mine to escape the grasp of drugs. After I picked her up she went into withdrawals that were so bad she cussed me up one side and down the other. She told me if I didn't do something quick she was going back to the motel and I would know what she would be doing.

 

UNCONSCIOUS CHOICES

Let me explain if I can. During the course of that particular day, I had been smoking pot and drinking. As the day grew longer, my girlfriend went further into withdrawal, caused by her drug addiction. I chose to believe that I could handle the situation. My desire for her was so strong that I lost my ability for rational thought. My mind was wrenched with pain.  Marijuana, alcohol and fear added to my confusion.

 My girlfriend gave me an ultimatum: get a car and drive her or allow her to walk back to the motel to join the junkies who were there.  "Now.  Now or I'll leave!" she screamed.

 I pleaded with her to wait while I asked my friend if I could borrow his car. By the time I entered my friend's house, I was so frantic with fear and out of my mind on drugs that I lost all control. I walked around in circles for a few minutes, trying to collect my thoughts. I glanced out the window and saw her leave.

  Her threats, the scenes at the motel, the drugs, and the fear all flashed through my mind. Everything I had hoped for was going with her. My mind exploded. The next thing I knew, my friend lay dead at my feet and I stood there with a bloody hammer in my hand. It took days before reality sunk in. Please don't wait until you get to my world to make a decision.

  Help to make the world a better place with a brighter future. Set the example for others to follow. Make the right choices. Say NO to drugs. If you choose to drink and do drugs, I'll be waiting to welcome you...when you end up in my world.